Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Reflection and the pervasiveness of love

After the frantic pace of the last few weeks I’ve been trying to level off in preparation for my big surgery day and the recovery to follow. When all this started I was determined to devote at least a bit of my time to prayer and reflection. I haven’t been so good at that lately so I’m working to get back on track – with thinking about things and with living life a bit more fully. While pursuing that goal this morning I had a realization that took me by surprise. Prepare yourself. This may be my most sappy post so far.

I have said many times here that I have been very lucky to have such a wonderful group of family, friends and co-workers who have been on hand to help me through all of this. When I was thinking about that this morning it occurred to me that this has always been the case for me. Remembering back as far as I can (which is pretty far at this now-advanced age) I can’t think of any time in my life where I doubted that I was loved. I can't say that I took this for granted but I never had cause to doubt it. It never occurred to me that everyone else might not have had the same experience or background. I see now how profound an influence it has been. It lets me move forward into things with confidence. More important, I believe that what good I have been able to do in this world was made possible by that foundation.

So, thank you once again to everyone for giving me this greatest of gifts. I will do my best to deserve it and return it back to you.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jim, I have 27 years more to look back on than you do, but if I thought that one of my children would be able to write this paragraph (Reflection, etc.) I would feel my life had been worthwhile.

JimD said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JimD said...

Oops, I tried to post a comment in reply but messed it up miserably. Here's a second try....

Thank you very much for this. It's true that it's a testimony to my family, and particularly to my mother who raised us as a single parent, that I was able to write this. Thank you for seeing that.

My family was never the type to say 'I love you' at every opportunity - although we're doing more as adults than we ever would have done when we were younger. It was something that was so fundamentally true that it never seemed to require saying.

I think that is how it is in most families and friendships. And it might be why we sometimes treat or speak to our family and friends more abruptly than we would to total strangers. (Not that I would ever do that or 'get the way I get,' of course!) Knowing that we have that unassailable bond allows us to take those risks.

I think, and hope, that most people have a similar impression of their childhoods. Taking a moment to acknowlege it in my background has made a big difference for me.