Assorted good news

My birthday was two days ago. I had a wonderful day filled with celebrations and well wishes. I got some good news from my doctor, too, who had sent me for an assortment of kidney function tests. They all came out fine. And today I had a visit with my pulmonologist. He said that my lung capacity has increased a little since a year ago. He said that that was probably because I had lost weight and it would increase a little more if I continue on this path - which is my plan. According to his records I am down 9 pounds since last year. That's not a lot but I only really started this campaign in August.

He also told me that my oxygen absorption rate has gone up from about 80% to 97% since last year. That was really good news to me. I still have less lung capacity than I did before - since I have less lung to work with - but it's good to know that it's working well. He told me that improvement like this is to be expected after surgery. he also told me that I seem to be where I should be at this point in the process and that I don't need to come back unless something bad - and unanticipated - comes up. I'm very happy about this. He's a very encouraging and kind man but I welcome the idea of not having to go back. One more part of this whole saga that is completed. I've been working with this doctor for three years. It's amazing to think back over that time and think of all that has happened, how much I have learned, and how my understanding of things both medical and non-medical has deepened since it all began.

I haven't tagged one of these posts as a medical update in a long time this counts as one. A happy development today.

A walk along the river

I was out for a meeting yesterday afternoon. It ended early and I planned to head home and plow through work email for the rest of the workday. It was so beautiful outside that I put myself down for a couple of hours of vacation time instead and took a walk.
I went to the Daniels area of Patapsco State Park. It's not far from my house and I sometimes take my kayak there to paddle up the river.

On foot, my favorite route there is to take a path along a ridge that meets the river about a mile upstream and then return along the riverbank. There are several stands of tall tulip poplars along that route. They seem to do well in the hollows between the hills. On windy days, which yesterday was not, it's fun to watch them sway back and forth.

I usually come upon deer in the woods and along the river I'll sometimes see turtles or frogs and occasionally a beaver. There are always geese. I think people feed them because when you get close to them they swim out to the middle of the river but then hang around and watch you. It's late enough in the year that they wouldn't be protecting a nest so I assume they're hoping for a handout.

The light along that part of the river is always good in the late afternoon but it's best at this time of year. Yesterday evening I was there early enough that there were very few other people around. Taking those hours off was a good decision.

Early September

Well, it's early September already. This year is flying by in a way I've never experienced before. All of the signs of the coming autumn are showing themselves. When I go walking in the morning the constellation Orion is clearly visible in the sky. I go very early and at the same time each day. It's interesting to watch how Orion began close to the horizon and now it's high in the sky. This morning I started to learn the names of the stars in Orion. I'm impressed by people who can identify the stars.

It's interesting too, to see how the colors of the landscape have changed - slightly but definitely. All summer the fields and woods were almost the same shade of green. Now there are differences. There are deep greens, pale greens and yellow or brown greens. It's as if everything wants to show its individual identity before fading completely for the winter.

The animals I see in the morning are changing, too. In midsummer I see groups of deer. I've seen as many as seven at a time. Now I see mostly only solitary ones. And there are owls calling in the woods now. I see foxes regularly. That hasn't changed. They're always alone, although you can sometimes hear them barking as each other. This morning I saw one that was just playing in the grass by itself. He headed for the woods when he saw me but he wasn't in a hurry. There have been groups of ducks most of the summer huddled in a quiet, shallow spot in the river but I haven't seen them lately. It has been so dry that the river level is too low for them now.

I do see one cat in the same spot each morning. She just sits and watches me stroll by. I say hello to her every morning that we see each other. That's one of the advantages of walking very early in the morning. Nobody hears you when you're talking to a cat or a deer or a fox. And don't ask me why the fox is a he and the cat is a she. That's what feels right. I certainly don't know for sure.

In other news, I'm having a little success in the weight loss campaign. I'm down about six pounds. It's not noticeable as far as I can tell but someone did ask if I had lost weight. That gave me more motivation to stick with this. I still have a ton of weight to lose but I'm just going to chip away at it a little at a time. One plus is that I'm saving a fortune on lunches at work. It's pretty cheap to pack a lunch made up of a container of yogurt and a few rice cakes.

Second half of summer

I'm on a campaign to lose weight. I've been loading it on for the past several years a little at a time and it has finally gotten to me. I'm hoping that my enthusiasm for this will hold. Many times it hasn't. Over the weekend I spent a little time observing people and I noticed how much easier daily things are for those who are thin. I've never been thin but I've never been this heavy. It's time to kick in with a weight loss campaign. we'll see how this goes. If I am to reach my real goal weight according to all the charts, I need to lose about 50 pounds. I'd settle for 30.

We are definitely in the second half of summer now. The roadside blue and white combination of Queen Anne's lace and chicory has given over to the gold and pink of black eyed Susan, goldenrod and Joe-pye weed. It's hard to believe that we're in mid-August already.

Back to walking

With the torn Achilles tendon I had stopped taking morning walks. Even though the doctor told me that I was healed enough to go back to normal activity, I had fallen off that morning routine. I started back to it again today. It was a good morning for a walk. We had some heavy rain yesterday and it cooled down quite a lot though the night. In the pre-dawn hour, the misty air created quite a serene feeling. I saw a few deer and some foxes. At one point, two foxes ran across the road in the distance. One seemed to be chasing the other. I heard them barking a few moments after that. It's not mating season so either it was a territory battle or just a couple of chums playing around. It was interesting to see in any case.

I am going to try to stick with the morning walks now that I started again. I realize that I do some of my best thinking when I'm out early in the morning with no distractions. It's a good way to start the day.

Surgeon follow-up

I had a follow-up appointment with my surgeon today. All went well. There is always someone who does a preliminary exam and then the surgeon comes in and has a second look. They reviewed my CT scan images and report, examined and re-examined me, listened to my lungs and felt around for new tumors. At one point they asked me if I had noticed any new masses in my armpits. I said that I hadn't. Mostly I wanted to say that if I had found something I would probably have mentioned it without having to be asked. They're all very kind there. I don't think I present much of an interesting challenge for them. I'm glad of that.

I have now progressed to the point that I won't see the surgeon himself at my next appointment. I'll meet with some of the doctors on his team. They all seem remarkably competent (while being annoyingly young) so I know I'll be in good hands. So, now I'm officially documented at the two and a half year point. That's a good feeling.

Halfway there

It was two and a half years ago today that I had surgery to remove the lung tumor. They talk a lot about a five year survival rate so I'm halfway there. This is a big landmark for me but not as big as it would be for some people. My tumor was less threatening and virulent than most.

Still, I got a letter from the hospital this week inviting me to a cancer survivor event. It's hard for me to think of myself in that light. I'm grateful that things are going so well.

I'll try to make the most of this day and spend my time on the really important things. One of those things was watching the sunrise. It was beautiful this morning.

Locust flowers

The weather has been a roller coaster ride lately. We have gone from frost warnings to the mid nineties in the span of a couple of days. Sunday was hot and steamy, followed by a drenching rain overnight and cooler temperatures today. All of this came just as the black locust trees were blooming. There is another type of locust tree that grows in this area. It's the honey locust. Even with that name I can't imagine how they could smell any sweeter than the black locusts.

They are exceptionally laden with flowers this year, maybe because of the regular rains we had this spring. As the moist air cooled this evening, it was filled with the scent of the locus flowers. One of my fondest childhood memories is the smell of the locusts blooming in the woods behind our house.

This is one stage in the parade of scents that comes with spring in this area. The daffodils, hyacinths and lilacs have come and gone. Now the locusts will have a few days in the spotlight alongside the lily of the valley. They'll be followed by peonies, the roses and finally the wild honeysuckle. I love this time of year.

Trouble all around me

Back when I was sick I was the one with the biggest problem. That is so far from true now. It seems that everywhere around me people are having trouble. There are medical, legal and financial issues as well as employment and family problems. I have been trying to think of things to do to help. It's difficult to come up with anything substantial. It's frustrating to be powerless to make a real difference. I will do what I can.

Easter and magnolias

It's Easter morning. This has always been my most important religious/spiritual day of the year. I love to get up early on Easter morning and spend some time in quiet reflection and gratitude. In recent years the word Christian has begun to have as much a political meaning as a religious one. That saddens me because my political and social opinions are often not in line with that more conservative view. Christianity has taken on a reputation for being judgmental and restrictive. To me it always will be a faith of understanding, acceptance, and love.

I took a long walk this morning as the sun was coming up. This was the first time I have done that since the doctor told me that my Achilles tendon had healed. It was a perfect way to welcome Easter. The sky was beautiful as the sun came up and the air was filled with the scent of spring flowers and the songs of birds.

The magnolias were in full flower this morning. In many years, they get bitten back by a late frost. This year they seem to have thrived on both the deep cold and the branch-breaking snow we had this winter. They are spectacular.

I'm off to start on the preliminary preparation for Easter dinner for my family now. I am very grateful for this day.

Foot news

I got good news today about my torn Achilles tendon. It's not completely healed but it is much better and has been improving steadily. I saw the doctor this morning and he gave me the all-clear to resume regular activities. I'll have to pay attention to it in case it acts up again. That shouldn't be hard. That thing really hurts when there's a problem so I won't hae any trouble noticing it.

I'm going to take a long walk tomorrow morning. I'm looking forward to that already.

Geese overhead

Twice yesterday I heard geese flying by. The first time it was light enough to see them, in a V formation, far above. The second time it was after sunset and I could only hear their voices in the distance.

When I was growing up, the geese would fly over our house each spring and fall. As soon as we heard them my mother would stop whatever she was doing and we would go outside to watch them fly by. This is one of my of my favorite memories.

I will always stop what I'm doing to watch the geese fly overhead. It reminds me to take time to appreciate the world and beauty that surrounds me, and it's a way of honoring the person who taught me to do that.

Ash Wednesday

It's Ash Wednesday. Lent is always a good time for me to take stock and make some personal improvements. This usually means that I'll be looking at my failed New Year's resolutions and giving them another try.

This year I have a list of various things that I hope to do daily. Some are as simple as making sure the dishes are done before I go to bed. Others are a more demanding and cerebral. Lent is good for this sort of thing since the religious tone adds an extra threat of guilt for not making good on my plans.

In the past we all tried to give up things for Lent. Lately the focus is to do something positive rather than give something up. I am following the positive action course this year but I did also decide to give up alcohol. That doesn't seem to be too much to ask. I've done it in the past and it's socially difficult but, luckily, not physically so! Of course when I made this vow I decided to book St. Patrick's Day as a free day. That seems only fair.

I have fallen out of the habit of posting here. Recently I read back over some past entries and I was glad to have the record that they provided. I will try to get back to the routine of posting regularly.

In the last week we have had two blizzards. The first left about 30" of snow. The second was only 8-12". More is predicted in a few days. The snow amounts have broken records and I'm glad that I was here to see it. Everyone is tired of snow now, of course, and we still have plenty of winter to go. In the past, it usually warmed up here after a big snow so that it didn't hang around for long. That hasn't been the case here. It was cold, is cold, and is predicted to stay cold. The snow is not going away. I slogged up the low hill behind my house today and saw that there is quite a load of snow on the roof. My roof pitch is not steep. There have been some roof collapses in the area and I don't want my house to be one of them. If I can, I'm going to clear some of the snow off the roof before the next wave comes. Here are a few photos:

A view from my back porch. The snow is so deep that it's difficult to wade through it.

The front of my house after the driveway was cleared.

The light under the spruce tree in the front of the house.

Tracks left by birds in the light snow that drifted onto my back porch.
I leave seed out for them every morning.

So many dear ones gone

I spent yesterday evening starting the final prep for Thanksgiving dinner. There will be ten of us at my house this year. I'm looking forward to it.

I have a couple of bittersweet Thanksgiving traditions. One is to buy a new container of poultry seasoning every year and mark the date on it. Once the holiday is over it goes into the Thanksgiving decorations box to be taken out and displayed the following year. I've been doing this ever since I started hosting Thanksgiving in 1996 when my mother died. We had found several containers of poultry seasoning in her kitchen cabinets and that somehow started this trend. It has been a long time now. This will be the fourteenth Thanksgiving with another seasoning container to mark the passing of a year.

We always make up a batch whiskey sours before dinner. We add a cherry to the glass for those who have died and often add extras for those we have lost in the year that is closing. This year there will be one for our Aunt Dolores, for cousin Joan and for Aunt Mary. I'll add one, too, for my friend Mary Jo's brother Jack. A small remembrance, it seems, but important to me at Thanksgiving. It reminds me to cherish the people I have with me and to be grateful for the time I had with those who have gone.

Tendon progress

Well, I had my third foot doctor appointment today to talk about the torn Achilles tendon. He had the results from my second MRI. It turns out that my original tear was about 5.5 mm horizontally. That doesn't sound like much to me but it's just under a quarter of an inch and evidently counts as a reasonably large injury.

After two months with that boot on my leg the tear has healed its way down to 4 mm. That's about a 20% improvement. The doctor said that he thought we should give it another month to heal and check again. Surgery would mean that I couldn't put any weight on it for 6 weeks. Waiting another month in the hope that it might keep healing seems like a good option go me. I'll need another MRI in four weeks and will see him again in mid-Deecember. If it continues to heal then I'll keep wearing the boot even after that. If not, it'll be surgery for me. Something fun for the holidays.

Speaking of holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming up. For Hallowe'en I wore the boot and carried a jug with three X's on it. I was bootlegger. It looks like I might need to come up with similar holiday related boot decorations for the next few months, too.

I am trying to be positive about this.

Two years today

It was two years ago today that I went in for surgery on the tumor in my lung. What a lot is different since then. And what a lot is the same. I haven't improved myself nearly as much as I had vowed to do. Personal change is harder than I realized.

This week I have been trying to help a dear friend who lost her brother to a sudden illness. It's difficult to do much of real substance but I tried to offer help where I could. The way her family rallied round him reminded me of the way my family and friends were with me when I was sick. I will be working to spend the day with a feeling of gratitude for all that has been given to me. I have been doing that more consistently lately but not as much as I would like. Landmarks such as this week has brought remind me how important it is to maintain that awareness. It lets me make the best of the time I have here.

Spring flowers in autumn

There are some crabapple trees alongside the short walkway that runs from the building where I work to the parking garage. They bloom beautifully in the spring and are covered with red fruit in the fall. Whoever picked them as a landscaping feature made a good choice.

One of the trees isn't doing as well as the others and this year it seemed to get picked on by tent caterpillars, too. As I was walking to the office the other day, I noticed that it had put out one small burst of flowers among the red crabapples and the withered leaves. To me, there was something in that. You could consider it to be valiantly brave to be blooming as winter approaches or maybe just foolishly desperate to be taking one pointless last stab at flowering when there's no hope of bearing fruit.

Those little flowers have lasted for several days so far and I'm struck by them each time I pass by. Just this morning I began to wonder why they seem so significant to me. Something else to think about.

Birthday 2009

Another birthday has come and gone. I had a wonderful day. I took an early morning walk along the river to find a geocache. It was located in/near a cool old log barn. The light was perfect at that time of morning.

It was a very cool morning and the mist was hanging low in the valleys and along the river. I took this short video of the curls of mist following the flow of the river downstream. It was very serene.

After that I met my brother John and his family for breakfast. I spent much of the afternoon on the phone talking to well wishers and in the evening I went to dinner with Sue, Harold, Cindy, Richard, and Mary Lou. It was a very good day.


I did get some health news in the days surrounding the weekend, too. I saw my pulmonologist on Friday. He said that I haven't shown any further loss of lung capacity since this time last year. By way of background information, they never got an accurate measure of my lung capacity from before the disease kicked in. The first test I had for that was after I had had the pneumonia and the tumor was suspected. It's likely my one lung was already compromised somewhat at that point. I'm showing a reduction of about 10 to 15 percent of lung capacity since then, due to the surgery. The fact that the lung capacity hasn't changed in a year is good news.

On another front, I went to the podiatrist today to see what the MRI had shown about my torn Achilles tendon. It turns out that it has a tear that involves about 1.5 inches of the tendon. From what he told me, if it's not treated it might snap or 'rupture'. Hearing that gave me the willies. I have to wear a large and cumbersome boot thing for four weeks. After that I'll have another MRI to see how much it might have healed. If it doesn't recover much, then I might have to have surgery. I'm not happy about that.

The boot is annoying but I'm going to do my best with it. If it allows the tendon to heal then it will have been worth the effort. I don't want to have the surgery if I can help it. I'll take whatever steps I need to get it as close as I can to 'good as new' so it won't give me trouble in the long term.

A new development

Well, yesterday I found out that I have a torn Achilles tendon. Since I started this blog to report health info during my tumor episode, it seems fitting to record this latest news here, too. Actually yesterday was just the day I got confirmation about what is going on. I knew something had been up for over a year. It hurts A LOT some of the time but not consistently. Lately it started to swell so I went to the doctor who sent me to a podiatrist. That doctor sent me for an MRI which confirmed the tendon tear.

I think this all started up when I pulled the tendon in August of 2008 while getting ready for that 5K at Disney World. It has taken a long time to ripen into a problem. I don't know what I'll need to do to get this one fixed. Of course I went right to the web and read all sorts of conflicting information about theraputic footwear, physical therapy and/or surgery. I'll wait until the doctor fills me in when I see him later this month. In the meantime I'll be hobbling along as usual.

Speaking of hobbling along, I have been trying to keep up with the morning walks despite the whole tendon/ankle thing. This morning I came upon my first real autumn leaf. It was still dark so I took a photo of it with my snappy new Blackberry phone with a built-in flash. Here's that picture.


Just before I saw the leaf I spotted a deer on the edge of the woods. This one was a buck with antlers. While I often see deer in the morning before dawn I have never spotted a buck like this before. That was a cool experience. From what I have read, this is the time of year when you're most likely to spot a buck. They grow antlers over the spring/summer and they begin to shed their covering of velvet in August as autumn approaches and deer romance season begins. They evidently shed the antlers once the honeymoon is over in December or later in the winter. We looked at each other for a while in the half light before he trotted off into the woods. A nice way to begin the day.