Balanced awareness or over-dramatization?

Lately several of my friends have faced serious health problems. Some of them have worked out well. While it hasn’t been easy for them, it’s a great relief to know that they have seen the worst of the current challenge and are on their way back. It remains to be seen how things are going to go for others. They are on my mind a great deal. While I had quite a dramatic run, it seems that I was let off the hook easily in comparison to others.

I have another routine follow-up appointment with my lung surgeon tomorrow. That required another CT scan and that was done today. In order to get the CT scan I had to go for blood tests last week. The novelty of all these tests has worn off. Now they seem just like more hoops to jump through – part of my payment for having gotten off the hook from that tumor.

I made a remark to someone the other day that these tests and appointments are the annoying part of not dying that I have to go through in order to get all the good things that life rolls my way. I meant it as a joke but there was truth in it, too. When I learned I had the tumor I vowed not to take as much for granted. At the same time I don’t want to moon along in the dramatic role of the disease survivor. It’s an interesting and difficult balance to maintain. I hope I’m doing a good job of it. It’s hard to know.