I couldn't resist using that subject line but it's actually accurate. Today I had a conversation with a light bulb. For those who might be worried about this I should say that the conversation was one-sided. The light bulb didn't say anything.
I try to decorate the house for Christmas on the weekend before Thanksgiving. It helps to remind me that Christmas isn't far away and I need to kick in with other preparations. The holiday will get away from me if I don't do the decorating right away. If I don't haul out the holly right after Thanksgiving then I just might be trying to play catch-up on December 26.
I put the electric candles in the window just before Thanksgiving. I like the way they bring a soft glow to the house. I have old window candles, some that came from my family's house and some that I bought from thrift stores years ago. They all take a standard, 4-watt bulb. Over the years times have changed and everyone uses small Christmas light that are either tiny incandescent bulbs or LED bulbs. I was raised on lights that have the bigger Snoopy's-doghouse bulbs (which will mean something to those who watch A Charlie Brown Christmas).
OK, after all that set up, this morning I saw that one of the bulbs had burnt out. When I looked at it I saw that it was a slightly different shape from the others. Some of the covering was peeling too. I realized that this was a bulb that had come from my family home. It must have been 20 or 30 years old and had been hanging on all this time. I replaced it, as I needed to do, but I didn't want to throw it in the trash. That seemed too dismissive. I did it, though. As I did, I thought how that little light bulb had run its course and had been important in a part of my life for decades. So I threw it in the trash, knowing that it had its destiny and I had mine. Our time together was important but it had ended. So, I had a little burial-at-trash-can moment with a light bulb and I wished it well on its journey.
Just after that little non-ceremony, a friend called to tell me that his mother had died. It was the third death of a parent among my friends in the last week. I have experienced the loss that they feel and am, in a way, further down that path of loss and acceptance. Holidays always bring back memories of those who have gone and to lose someone close to the holidays makes that even sadder. I have them all in my mind, hoping that their memories will let them see sorrow from a distance and joy nearby in the days and years to come.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Five years today
It was five years ago today that I had the surgery to remove the tumor from my lung. I won't get the official all-clear from the doctor until early December but I'm not expecting any surprises. It has been a day of quiet celebration for me. I did send a message to my family today to thank them for all the support they gave me. I have tried not to talk about it aside from that. It's enough that this day is important to me. I don't need for it to be an event for anyone else. But.....
Just as I wrote that last sentence I got a delivery of flowers from my sister and brother-in-law. Beautiful roses, carnations, stocks and chrysanthemums. A mix of colors and scents. I said that this day doesn't need to be an event for anyone but me. Still, it's wonderful to know that it is important to others, too.
Just as I wrote that last sentence I got a delivery of flowers from my sister and brother-in-law. Beautiful roses, carnations, stocks and chrysanthemums. A mix of colors and scents. I said that this day doesn't need to be an event for anyone but me. Still, it's wonderful to know that it is important to others, too.
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